All I know about animal behavior I learned in Loehmann's dressing room
(Audio)

This abridgment has been approved by the author.

Read by the author.

Here Erma Bombeck proves that a behaviorist need not wear a safari jacket and live in a tent in order to be an expert on every facet of a species' behavior. From the aerobics classroom -- where humans defend their territory to the death by spraying their mats with their own personal perfume -- to our migratory patterns -- where, like a certain species of butterfly, we fly to Miami in hordes the minute the temperature drops below sixty, Erma demonstrates in her quintessentially Bombeckian style that while animals may have more fun, longer tails, and better sex lives, the gap that separates us from the animal kingdom is closing fast.